The end of an era…

Photo by Michelle Bryant

This will be my last blog entry.

I can just see and hear my dear friend, Angela, rolling her eyes and saying, as only the closest of friends can say, “Are we back to this again?” Yes. But I’m certain this time that I mean it.

Oh there are reasons, but some are too personal, and some might be offensive, and so perhaps it is best to just leave it at this: this blog is no longer serving the purpose I intended it to in my life, and instead of making my life better, I feel it is doing the opposite.

I’m sure some of you will want more details than this, so buy me a cup of coffee someday and we can talk all about it. In the meantime, please read my list:

Possible Frequently Asked Questions Regarding Literarygirl’s End to Blogging:

Will you ever be back?
I never say never, but I have no plan to at this time. I do think there is a good chance that I will search out some other avenue to do a photography only site, but not now. And there is always the chance that I become a famous author and my publicist INSISTS upon me writing a blog entry daily to my countless fans…

Was it something I did?
I’m not gonna lie…maybe it was. There are a lot of things going into this decision, and I have to say that it does involve other people. (This would apply to the “some might be offensive” comment I made earlier.)

Are you okay?
Yes, thank you for asking.

How will I know what is going on in your life?
Email me. Call me. Send me a letter. Text me. Invite me to tea.

What about flickr and vegiegirl and etsy?
I will keep posting pictures to flickr. I haven’t decided about vegiegirl yet. My etsy shop is still up and running and will have more in it soon. In fact, email me or leave me a comment if you want to be notified when it is updated. I’m also on myspace and youtube and facebook…and will continue to be indefinitely.

Will you continue to write?
Yes. In fact, I’m hoping to write a lot more now…perhaps I’ll finish one of those half-completed novels sitting on my hard drive.

Will you still read my blog?
Yes, of course.

What will I do now with all this extra time that I used to spend reading Literarygirl?
Good question! I can offer a few suggestions that should suit the diversity of my many, many readers:

• Read a book! I highly recommend this or this.
• Watch some TV. I recommend this or this.
• Listen to some music. I recommend Patty Griffin, Brett Dennen, and anything by Train or Pat Monahan.
• Go for a walk! Bake something! Play with your kids! Play with a dog! Write a letter! Take a picture! Paint a picture! Color a picture with your kids while you play with your dog with banana bread baking in the oven! Do cartwheels! Volunteer! Go to church! Go on a date! Take a nap!

Okay, in all seriousness, I want to THANK YOU so much for reading, for the kind words, for the not kind words that were meant to be kind but didn’t sound like it, for taking an interest in my life and family. I have really enjoyed this whole adventure!

God Bless and PEACE!

Photo by Michelle Bryant

xoxoxo
Jodi

 

How to Survive a Weekend with FIVE kids

On Friday night when they arrive, quickly put them in pajamas, make popcorn, and put on a movie.

 

Saturday morning when they wake up at 5:45am do your best to keep them quiet and in their own rooms until 7:00am.

Give up around 6:25am and let them play.

At 7:00am, start drinking coffee.

At 7:30am, make pancakes.

By 8:20am all five children will be dressed and ready for the day. Begin to wonder why it is only 8:20am.

Ask your husband what time it is and act appalled when he replies 9:15am. You are certain it is 10:30am.

At 9:45am give in to the begging and pleading and take the kids to the park 15 minutes before the set 10:00am departure time.

Play at the park. Run them around and round. Play tag. Kick the ball. Goal: wear them out.

At 11:20am, after you exclaim that it feels like noon, leave the park and pick up pizza and another movie for evening. Also get free cookie dough. Open dough and take first bite while still in car.

Feed 2YO (2 year old) lunch and put her down for nap. Make lunch for bigger kids and feed them out back.

Clean up lunch. Take another bite of cookie dough. Reheat coffee that remains in pot.

For the next two hours, wander around house picking things up, wander outside to check on kids and husband, chat with neighbor.

Look at clock at 2:01pm and check to see if batteries are operating properly. It MUST be later than 2:01pm. Take another big bite of cookie dough.

Break up fight over remote control Jeep. Deal with drama that ensues when dog gets attacked by neighbor dog. Wake up 2YO and take her outside.

Feed all 5 kids popsicles.

Clean up all 5 kids after eating popsicles.

Let kids play until 3:45pm. Take them in and comment that it feels much later than 3:45pm. Take another bite of cookie dough.

Let kids play inside then begin bathing them. Bathe 2YO. Bathe 8YO. Bathe 6YOb. (There are three six year olds, so a would be Ash, b would be Savan, c would be Car, in order of age.) Head downstairs to start oven for pizza and cut strawberries. Eat cookie dough. Think about opening wine but decide against it. Comment that it feels much later than 4:35pm.

Realize you left 6YOb in bathtub and it has been 20 minutes. Head upstairs just as you hear, “AUUNNTIE JO.” Remove 6YOb from tub while laughing that you forgot about her, which she finds hilarious as she was perfectly happy playing. Drain brown water and fill it back up for 6YOc.

Throw all outfits from Friday and Saturday into washing machine. Continue to create order. Continue to watch children play. Bake pizza. Sit down to dinner around 5:45pm. Somehow make it through a dinner that could only be described as, “Chaotic” and/or “loud”.

Clean up dinner. Eat more cookie dough. Kids begin watching Snow Buddies.

At 7pm, make kids popcorn. Switch clothes to dryer. Get beds ready.

At 7:45pm begin teeth, last trips to bathroom, help pick out books they will read quietly in bed.

At 8:00pm turn off lights.

At 8:15pm, check on kids and see the following:

Go downstairs, make some hot tea, eat some more cookie dough, return to sofa upstairs and find this:

Read a little. Watch a little TV. Crash into bed around 9:45pm.

Wake up and head to fridge to make bottle. Open fridge and notice that the cookie dough container is almost gone. Ask husband how much he had and cringe at answer. Promise to not eat any more cookie dough. Break promise about one hour later.

Interesting article about not being able to let go of a home after you sell it…the oppositve of buyer’s remorse. Can anyone relate?

AI

“This! Is A-mAIR-i-Cun Idol.” Yes, I spent all last night mocking the way Ryan Seacrest says that intro. I have never been into AI enough to watch anything more than the finale, but this season, I haven’t missed an episode since they’ve been down to the last 10. I totally GET it now. I feel I have a connection with each of them. Of course Brooke had a hard time with the Mariah Carey week, she’s an alto! Of course Jason had a hard time last week, his voice just isn’t strong enough to do Broadway!

So in my ever so humble opinion, I would have guessed elimination would have gone down like this: Brooke, Jason, Syesha, Carly, and then one of the two David’s. Either could take it and it would be fine with me. I think I like Cook a tiny bit more, though. So to have Carly go last night? Wow. Didn’t see that coming.

I like Brooke. I think she seems so sweet and genuine. I like how she carries herself. Classy. But…she is not the strongest singer at ALL. So to have her stay makes it clear that this is not just about singing. Even though she is my favorite as far as personality…I voted for David Cook 5 times. (YES, I even VOTED!)

I need to go. My kids need to get to school and I have a busy day ahead. No time to be waxing poetic about AI.

Have a good one!

Apparently reconstructive surgery has gotten so common that you can now purchase a book to read to your children to explain your new nose, new tummy, new boobs, ETC.  I just wonder how I could ever convince my child that what is most important is the inside, not the outside, if I was having such significant work done that I would need a book to explain the changes to my kid.  I don’t love every single thing about my appearance, but I will never willingly go under the knife to change something for vanity reasons, nor will I inject anything into myself. No, I don’t love the wrinkles that are already appearing on my face, but I am not afraid to get older nor am I afraid to look older. If it’s your thing, go for it, but as for me, this is one book we will not need on our bookshelf at home.

I’ll have to make this quick because I don’t really have free hands this morning…a certain Two Year Old is refusing to be put down.

I am now typing around her.

Anyway, I have been doing lots of “thinking” about a few things this week. I am so thankful to have my friend, Angela, who I can call up and immediately dive into some deep, rambling thought process and my conclusion and ask her interpretation and we can together sort through it all and make sense of it. So this has been a topic of our conversations this week…

Unless you have been living under a rock, you know that Oprah’s current flavor of the month is Eckhart Tolle and his book A New Earth. I have not read the book (yet?) but I did read his interview with Oprah this month in O Magazine. He makes a few points, the first being the importance of separating our thoughts with our self. I’ll let you look into that further to figure it out…I’m not certain I can grasp it enough to really explain it right now. His second point was the importance of living in the moment…I’ve heard it called The Power of Now. I’ve talked about this before on the blog, it is certainly a common self-help idea taught by many different ideologies. And it is something I struggle with and have believed achieving would greatly improve my life.

Now I can’t quote this exactly because I wasn’t there, and from the online research I’ve done, no one is claiming they have this word for word. But Elizabeth Gilbert, author of the amazing Eat Pray Love, apparently discussed this idea of living in the moment and said that it seems virtually impossible for the average person to do. She also went on to say that the happiest people she knows are those who have lots of great memories and a lot to look forward to. She then said her advice for being happy is to take lots of pictures and make lots of plans. (I can see Stephanie nodding as she reads this as I know she would subsrcibe to this thinking in a second!)

I like this thought a lot. I like being able to release myself from that constant struggle of being present. But as my friend Angela said, this, like so much lese in life, seems like a balancing act. It certainly is important to not live in the past if one is constantly re-living bad choices or circumstanes, and it is not good to constantly plan your life and not enjoy the plans you made. I think my question is this: what do we gain from living in the moment constantly? That is what I have yet to really understand.

I think, in my life, I have a fairly good balance. I like planning ahead and looking forward to things, but I regularly make a conscious effort to be exactly where I am at that moment…for example, this morning, cuddled up next to my daughter, I focused all my energy on feeling her in my arms and listening to her words as she told me how much she loved me (to the moon and back 148 times). And now, that moment lives on in my memory.

Thoughts?

home

Friday night I was sitting on the couch waiting for Aaron to get home from a business trip hoping he could see the kids before they went to bed. I was having some feelings that I can only describe as “omigosh i have to throw a party for eleven children tomorrow and take care of five children from now until late tomorrow night and have company and keep everyone alive and happy and clean and fed aaaaaaah.” I was feeling very small and very alone. Something happened at the same time that stirred a small amount of anxiety in me, as in, “wow that would be horrible if that happened to me.” And then I remembered Aaron, and that he was coming home, and that he is always there with me, for me, to help me, to stand beside me, and all the feelings sorta went away.

It made me think of a podcast I had heard earlier in the week when a woman was explaining her favorite feature on her GPS system was the button that says GO HOME. Apparently no matter where you are you just push this button and it will then guide you to your house. I realized that Aaron is my GO HOME button. Regardless of where I am or what is going on, he is home to me. His presence is a guarantee (as much as anyone’s can be), and the reminder that I have him in all situations that I may face instantly brings me comfort.

Yesterday our pastor said something I disagreed with. (He also said, “Don’t just be a hater, don’t just drink the hater-ade” but that is a different story.) He said that you shouldn’t marry someone unless you cannot live without them, if you can live without them, then don’t marry them. I am sure he was not meaning this as literally as I took it, but I disagreed with him because I could live without anyone. I know that. I happen to be someone who thinks through my worst-case-scenerio’s regularly and come up with plans in case they happened. I am certain that I could live regardless of any of these happening to me which brings me a certain comfort. I am certain that with Christ alone I could live this life. So yes, I could live without Aaron. I just don’t want to. He is home.

SIX

I’ve seen you make one oreo cookie last for an hour.

You think if a shirt is cute and a skirt is cute then there is no reason they can’t go together…

and that yellow rainboots go with everything.  

You smile when you lie, and although I hate that you lie, I like that I can tell instantly.

You sing loud, and off-key, and you don’t care at all.

You make up songs and stories and phrases and say the most random things all the time.

You are one huge ball of energy…

and love and kindness…

and I think you are one of the most amazing creatures I have ever known.

 

 

 

Party Time

There was B.I.N.G.O and presents and cupcakes and digging in boxes to see what you feel…all in all, a successful 6th birthday party!

More on flickr.

 

This week…

Although I know it is not necessary to write here daily, it hangs over my head when I have not written all week. I have been tired. Very, very tired. I am blaming allergies and a busy weekend. Allergies came on with a bam Saturday and I am using all my resources [leftover meds from my 6 week cold] to get through the day. It seems to be working. I am finding that the more I force myself to do, the more energy I have. I feel that I can get sucked into a trap of resting/napping due to fatigue that I think is actually brought on by the resting/napping I do to fight it. A never ending cycle. I have been taking walks at night with my MP3 player listening to podcasts, getting lost in the neighborhoods around me. I spent this morning in constant cleaning mode for 2 hours which felt really, really great. But I’m not gonna lie…I feel like taking a nap. Allergies tend to wipe me out, not to mention the drugs I take to fight them.

I have been listening to some SARK podcasts this week, reaquainting myself with her work and even purchasing an old book of hers I don’t own yet. She has a new book coming out this summer which I am looking forward to reading. Although at times she can be a little “much”, I still find her inspiring and a voice that reminds me to take care of myself. I can easily get into doing doing doing and forget to think at all. Yesterday I literally felt a weight on my chest, as though someone was sitting on top of me, and I realized I needed to stop and figure out what it was. I am dealing with the realization that I am not good at listening and supporting someone in my life while simultaneously separating myself from the issue. I take it on, literally, and carry it around with me all day long. I don’t yet know the answer to this, because this is part of my spiritual gifting, compassion. I want to help…I want to do something…and sitting back doesn’t feel right, yet I know that is often exactly what I have to do. Nothing. Do nothing. I scratch my head at that idea because it seems so foreign to me. But I’m working on not owning what is not mine to own.

And now…I am going to finish the last few chapters of the book I am reading then get back to work horse mode.

Anyone else struggling to figure out some life lessons right now? 

* FYI: Just going to amazon.com to get the links for the books in this post I ended up buying 3 used books. UH! Addiction…